are you still at the devil's house?
Don't make out with my wife yet
I wanna passion pit in your ass
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
