1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
