The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize