Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
