it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
This is the high leading the old right now
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize