Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
