I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
