i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
