Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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