I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
