did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
do herpes really smell.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Randomize
