a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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