How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize