so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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