I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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