Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I just made out with a guy for $7.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Randomize
