Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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