idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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