I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
