The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
