No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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