Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
