Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
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