It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
I party with great urgency now.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
