sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
