dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
