You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize