Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Randomize
