My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
