If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
