so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
