420 ftw
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Randomize