Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
