I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
