sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
