We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
