Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
