But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
