I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
