is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Randomize
