i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize