so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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