K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
