I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
