I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Is her dick bigger than yours?
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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