ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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