Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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