Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
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