Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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