as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
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