garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
She is in my trunk
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
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